17 Jul “Mindfulness in the Means” A Guest Blog Post by YAMA
After the loss of my sister in a tragic accident, my perspective shifted from more of an internal locus of control (LOC) to an external one. After losing my mother a few years later, my senses of control and safety lessened. Since my closest and most supportive loved ones were gone, due to reasons beyond our control, I felt alone and did not know where I fit in with the rest of my family. As a result of these losses, I became more goal oriented. I focused on results. I wanted control and accomplishments, likely to experience more of an internal LOC. This, in turn, made me feel more safe and secure. Additionally, as a student of psychology I learned an internal LOC was healthier than an external LOC.
While studying ethics, I learned the means to an end is as important, if not moreso, as the end result. Specifically, how you get to a goal is at least as important as the outcome. For example, the act of painting a picture is at least as important as the finished product. While I still believe this, I realize more and more what I do or do not do in daily life does not have to be connected to goals. Sometimes the means are the only thing of importance. In other words, the picture may not be important at all, only the painting.
Now that I am developing more mindfulness, goals are becoming less important. There are always going to be some things I can control and some things beyond my control. Now I am better at living, letting go, and enjoying life. Now that I am becoming more mindful, I feel more connected with energy in the universe and flow of life. This helps me to live in the present moment. I have enough. I am enough.